Movies really have us fucked up about love.

Because somewhere along the way, we started believing that if something is right, it should unfold a certain way.

You meet.

There’s chemistry.

Somebody says the perfect thing.

There’s a misunderstanding somewhere around the middle because apparently every love story needs one. 😂

Then somebody runs through an airport, knocks on a door in the rain, or gives a speech that somehow says everything they should’ve been saying for the last two hours.

Music plays.

Everybody cries.

The end.

Except real life does not know a damn thing about a script.

Sometimes you don’t get the ending you wanted.

And maybe that doesn’t always mean something went wrong.

Sometimes the ending you wanted would have kept you somewhere you had already outgrown.

Sometimes what feels like disappointment is actually life refusing to give you the same story you keep trying to force.

And sometimes you don’t get the ending you wanted because there is another ending you actually need.

I’ve been single for a while, and there is one man I still cannot completely figure out.

And I know that probably sounds ridiculous, but…

I like that.

😂

Hear me out.

There is something about not already knowing exactly what somebody is going to say before they say it.

Because that drives me crazy.

If I can predict every response, every reaction, every little line like we rehearsed this shit before you got here, eventually I’m going to get bored.

Sorry.

Ladies, don’t get my words tangled.

I need a man to be dependable.

I absolutely need consistency.

I need to know that your character isn’t changing every Tuesday depending on your mood.

But dependable and predictable are not the same thing.

I need dependable. I do not need predictable.

I don’t want chaos.

I don’t want confusion.

And I definitely don’t want somebody keeping me guessing about whether they actually give a damn about me.

That is not what I mean.

But I do want discovery.

I want there to still be things about you that surprise me.

I want conversations that don’t feel like I already know the ending.

I want you to occasionally say something that makes me sit there like, Wait… what?

In a good way. 😂

Because maybe part of what makes a connection interesting is realizing that there are still rooms inside another person you haven’t walked into yet.

And maybe love isn’t supposed to feel like memorizing somebody.

Maybe it’s supposed to feel like learning them.

Over and over.

That doesn’t mean ignoring red flags because somebody is mysterious.

Please don’t leave here blaming UT because you fell in love with a man who disappears for six business days. 😂

There is a difference between intrigue and instability.

A very large difference.

But I think we’ve gotten so used to wanting certainty that sometimes we forget relationships involve another whole human being.

Not a character.

Not somebody written specifically to respond the way we want.

A person.

And people are complicated.

They change.

They surprise you.

They disappoint you.

They grow.

Sometimes they leave.

Sometimes they come back different.

Sometimes you do.

Maybe that’s what the movies get wrong.

They make the ending feel like the proof that the love was worth having.

But maybe every connection isn’t supposed to end with forever.

Maybe some people are chapters.

Maybe some are plot twists.

Maybe somebody can matter deeply and still not be your ending.

And maybe not getting the ending you wanted doesn’t mean you missed out on love.

Maybe it means life gave you the ending you needed so you could keep becoming whoever comes next.

I don’t know.

I’m still figuring that part out.

And strangely enough?

I kind of like that too.

Because I need life to be dependable enough that I can stand on it.

But I don’t need the whole damn story to be guessable.

Where’s the fun in that?

— UT
Without the I.